{"id":264354,"date":"2026-07-15T02:03:51","date_gmt":"2026-07-14T23:03:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/1kitap1.com\/en\/i-feel-your-pain-a-m-ellis\/"},"modified":"2026-07-15T02:03:51","modified_gmt":"2026-07-14T23:03:51","slug":"i-feel-your-pain-a-m-ellis","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/1kitap1.com\/en\/i-feel-your-pain-a-m-ellis\/","title":{"rendered":"I Feel Your Pain – A M Ellis"},"content":{"rendered":"
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If I wanted to, I could walk into a place just as fancy as Knitted and Knotted and take advantage of their Pain Carrier discount. If I wanted. It was a weird feeling, especially knowing I could feel my hellflares. For me, it felt like the advertisements shouted, For carrying our hell in your veins, here\u2019s forty per cent off the clearance rack. I stopped short of Spa Hebe. Braided hyssop and ivy framed the door, and instead of a window display, a water feature trickled over a bronze mosaic of the spa\u2019s namesake \u2013 the Greek goddess of youth.<\/p>\n

I tucked myself beneath the shade of a neighboring awning as a sleek coupe pulled up to the valet. My breath hitched. Cas jumped out, his grin effortless and too freaking adorable. He wore designer jeans, a crisp white button-up, and a snapback that kept his waves from falling into his eyes. He tossed the valet his keys and glanced up and down the street, fidgeting as he tried to find the perfect pose to look hot while waiting.<\/p>\n

It was cute \u2013 we were both anxious. I\u2019m going on a date with Castor Fox. This was it. I exhaled, gathered my nerves and emerged from my hiding place. \u2018Looking for someone?\u2019 His eyes legit twinkled. \u2018You made it!\u2019 He pulled me into a hug and \u2013 stars \u2013 he smelled good, like citrus and a salty breeze. \u2018I can\u2019t believe you didn\u2019t let me pick you up. I checked the route \u2013 it took you three buses to get here. From now on, I\u2019m your chauffeur.<\/p>\n

Deal?\u2019 I smiled. \u2018Deal.\u2019 \u2018Good. Now, before we go inside, I have to do this the right way this time.\u2019 He pulled me aside for privacy, then stepped back and did a little spin. \u2018Notice anything?\u2019 Short of admiring him, I wasn\u2019t sure what he wanted me to see. \u2018OK, to be fair, hellflares aren\u2019t a twenty-four-seven thing.\u2019 He shifted his solisWatch, flashing the inside of his right wrist. \u2018I don\u2019t have helical disease any more. I gave it away.<\/p>\n

A match came through two weeks ago, after my interview.\u2019 My heart skipped and I couldn\u2019t speak. I didn\u2019t know what stole my breath more \u2013 the fact that he was now a Pain Giver, or the timing. The smallest part of me had found comfort in thinking we\u2019d be going through this pain together, even if I couldn\u2019t tell him the truth.<\/p>\n

\u2018I wanted to tell you in person, so you could see me \u2013 face to face,\u2019 he said quietly. \u2018Only my family knows.<\/p>\n

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A. M. Ellis is a speculative fiction author and lover of everything steeped in myth and mystery. Her stories often lean into diverse voices, not only in her identity as a Black woman, but in exploring neurodivergence and mental health. A proud introvert and nostalgic gamer, she lives in Maryland, USA, with her husband and three children. OceanofPDF.com A. M. Ellis I FEEL YOUR PAIN OceanofPDF.com For Evelyn Elaine, Jeanette Cecelia, Alexis Margaret and Gloria Bernadette.<\/p>\n

You were the strength for your family for so long. Rest easy. OceanofPDF.com OceanofPDF.com CHAPTER ONE Nova FORTY-THREE DAYS LEFT As always, I was in a rush \u2013 a surprise to no one but my bruised ego. Had I been on time, I never would\u2019ve taken the shortcut, and I never would\u2019ve gotten into that accident. But then, I never would\u2019ve met him.<\/p>\n

I promised myself two minutes to tweak my mural sketch. Red-violet rays fell over my drawing of Alta Bay, the solar flare that rocked the world over a century ago consuming my community on the south end. My lips curved, inspiration sparking as I captured the detail. I ignored the itch of my expired contacts and basked in satisfaction.<\/p>\n

The rendering was perfect. Then, the blare of my snoozed alarm rang and my smile faltered. Two minutes had turned into thirty. Per usual, I was late. \u2018Seriously, Nova. You had one job,\u2019 I mumbled. Well, I had two: almost full-time waitress for Caf\u00e9ology and sleep- deprived freshman at South Alta Community College.<\/p>\n

Art, while a beautiful way to decompress, didn\u2019t pay the bills. I abandoned the rendering and managed to knock over my UV-protectant eye drops in the process. The crystalline liquid seeped into the carpet. I would\u2019ve stopped to groan in frustration, but I didn\u2019t have time for that. Cornflower blue peeked from beneath the stack of clean clothes smushed to one side of my bed.<\/p>\n

I pulled my waitress dress from the bottom of the pile, shaking out the wrinkles before stuffing it into my backpack. An attempt was made. The front door creaked as I hurried into the hall, my older brother home and looking beat after his shift on the solar-powered skyrise construction project uptown. He wiped sweat from his brow, the droplets adding a sheen to his warm-brown complexion.<\/p>\n

Leo lifted one foot to step inside, saw my eyes narrow, and thought better of it. Those mud-caked boots on his feet \u2013 he knew where to leave them. He winked as he slipped them off outside, along with his sweat-soaked socks. I swore I heard them splat when they hit the porch.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This is a short excerpt from the opening of “” by Unknown, quoted for review and introduction purposes. All rights belong to the copyright holders.<\/em><\/p>\n

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