Growing Through Grief – Alex Mammadyarov LMHC (1)

Grief waves are essentially swells of emotion and physical sensation. We may feel more acute sadness, longing, disbelief, or even anger. We might notice tension or exhaustion in our bodies, finding ourselves needing more rest than usual. These waves can occur around significant dates or milestones, as well as on ordinary days, in grocery stores and while doing laundry and in the midst of a movie —almost anywhere and in any situation you can imagine. I know what you might be thinking: So, basically they can happen at any time?

The most important thing to keep in mind as we dive further into grief waves is that they are supposed to happen. They are not a defect, or a sign of dysfunction, and they usually do not signal a crisis. If anything, a grief wave highlights our ability to adapt to life’s deepest pains and most tender challenges. Think about it like this: At some point after loss, you are able to go about daily life, not only functioning but maybe even experiencing joy.

(If you are not there yet, that’s okay.) From time to time, you need to give yourself space to pause and feel into the depth of what you have gone through, coming into closer contact with what you always know to be true on some level: your person has really died and it does really hurt that much. The wave is a deep and visceral remembering. It is when all that remains under the surface rises up.

The grief has never disappeared, it has just slipped into the background while you were living. We live, we grieve, we rest, repeat. This is how we grow through grief. Triggers and Coping Strategies Grief waves can go on for just a few moments and can span as long as a few days. They may start slowly ahead of a significant date. This is an especially important time to seek out support and not isolate. It can also be vitally helpful to understand what tends to bring the grief up.

So, what triggers a grief wave? Milestone Events In the text exchange with my sister on my father’s birthday, I lamented being flooded with tears at my workplace. I don’t know why this is hurting me so much this year, I guess all the good things happening, I surmised. It wasn’t just his birthday that triggered my grief, it was also the presence of so many exciting changes in my life. I was planning my wedding, which would take place that summer and then I would be off to graduate school.

One might think that these milestones would provide a buffer from the sadness and longing, or at least a welcome distraction. The truth is, however, that the good days hurt too.

“Alex Mammadyarov is the grief whisperer! In Growing Through Grief, she describes the many aspects of the grief experience, laying out a path that is not about passing through anticipated stages but embarking on an open- ended process of personal growth. Written for those still working with an earlier loss, as well as those currently deep in the process, Growing Through Grief offers wise companionship that considers all the subtle nuances readers are likely to encounter along the way.” —Kara Hoppe, MA, MFT, psychotherapist, death doula, and author of Baby Bomb “Growing Through Grief is the book I wish I’d had close by during the quiet, disorienting moments after loss.

With tenderness and clarity, Alex Mammadyarov reminds us that grief isn’t something we ‘get over,’ but something we grow through. She holds space for grief’s depth and complexity while offering supportive, grounded tools for living inside it. If you’re moving through grief or walking beside someone who is, Growing Through Grief is a generous guide that offers both comfort and unexpected hope.” —Cyndie Spiegel, author of Microjoys: Finding Hope (Especially) When Life Is Not Okay “Alex Mammadyarov is a bright and important new presence in the bereavement field.

Her mix of personal experience and professional insight is exactly the kind of combination that will help move the field forward into new arenas. Her book will be a comfort for and an inspiration to every reader.” —Hope Edelman, author of Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss “This book is a beautiful and compassionate companion for anyone navigating the terrain of loss. With heartfelt wisdom, clinical insight, and deep humanity, Alex Mammadyarov offers gentle and tender guidance without pressure.

A true gift for grievers, this is a validating, supportive, and tenderly honest book. You’ll feel seen, not fixed. A necessary balm for aching hearts.”

This is a short excerpt from the opening of “” by Unknown, quoted for review and introduction purposes. All rights belong to the copyright holders.

Book Information

• Unique ID: adfbe8d0ec8cdf7e
• File Extension: .pdf
• File Size: 2,495,977 bytes (2.38 MB)
• Title: –
• Author: Unknown
• ISBN: 9781648485800
• Pages: 201
• Language: English (en)

Reading & Word Statistics

• Estimated Reading Time: 253.81 minutes
• Total Words: 50,763
• Total Characters: 286,424
• Average Words per Page: 252.55
• Average Characters per Page: 1425.0

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